Before We Were Yours

Title: Before We Were Yours
Author: Lisa Wingate
Major Themes: Historical Fiction, Trafficking, Kidnapping, Adoption
Synopsis: Rill Foss lead an idyllic childhood on the river shantyboat her family called home…until the day she and her siblings were taken from the boat and placed in a children’s home.

A week or so ago, when I realized I had a boring, noisy job to do for several hours, I jumped on my Libby app and scrolled through to find an interesting audiobook to entertain myself with while I worked. I’d heard Lisa Wingate’s name in the past, but never read any of her books—so Before We Were Yours was a new experience. And what an experience! Of all the books I’ve read in 2023 so far, this was the most heart-wrenching of the lot, probably hands-down. I was tearing up at times, and I never cry. It was a powerful story, and I’m really glad I picked it that day, even if it was difficult to get through in some ways.

Publisher’s description:

My thoughts:

It’s been a long time since a book made me want to bawl, but Before We Were Yours brought me very close to that (and it takes a lot to make me cry!). Phew, but this was a heart-wrenching read. I remember hearing bits of the history told in these pages at different times—but it’s something else entirely to experience it first-hand with characters you care about. There’s a good reason why this book became a bestseller.

I hardly know where to start in describing this story. For starters, I loved how Avery Stafford was willing to lay aside a promising career to support her family—even if she struggled with some of the social conventions thrust upon her in the process. I also loved seeing Rill’s fierce love and devotion to her family; that was beautiful, and if I were in her shoes, I hope I would be half as devoted as she was. I think I related more to Rill than Avery, but both characters were well-formed, well-rounded, and the kind of people I’d love to be friends with. The family element of this book is very strong. I loved how the families described in the story stood up for, protected, and helped each other—even when it was difficult to do so.

The history? That part left me reeling more than once. I cannot even begin to comprehend how people can do such horrible things to other people—and children, at that!—and, honestly, I don’t want to even try to understand. I did appreciate that Lisa Wingate didn’t shy away from the facts, but at the same time, she had clearly defined boundaries, and scenes never got to the icky stage for me (phew, and praise the Lord for that!). Some horrible, horrible things were alluded to…but never actually got “on page”, as it were. From a historical standpoint, as far as I can tell, this is a well-researched story, and I appreciate that.

If you’re looking for a well-written book with a good dose of history, family, and mystery, Before We Were Yours could be a good choice for you. Be prepared to stay up late reading, but also be prepared to be brought into Avery and Rill’s worlds. I loved the way the different locations were described…I’ll probably never forget the feeling of floating down the bayou with Rill and her sister in a little boat, or the way Huckleberry Finn brought such joy into a cheerless, hopeless, locked cellar room. This is a book that grips you and doesn’t let go easily, but is a satisfying read, all the same. It isn’t a Christian story (I don’t think God is even mentioned once), but it’s still well worth the read. Highly recommended.

WARNING: People lie in ch. 6, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 16, 22, and 24. “Good heavens” is used in ch. 6; heavens is used in ch. 7; cursed or a variant is used in ch. 7 and 24; “good gracious” is used in ch. 8; infernal is used in ch. 19; cusses and “thank the saints” are used in ch. 24; and God’s name is used wrongly twice in ch. 25. I didn’t always get specific chapters, but I did my best. There are several vague references to “growing up soon” and “getting girl parts”, but I don’t remember where. Prelude: a brief description of a woman in labor and a baby apparently stillborn. Ch. 2: A woman in labor, screaming; midwife says she thinks she’ll die if she doesn’t get help; children remember seeing the corpse of a man who died by hanging. Ch. 3: Mention of a woman who was found alone with her dead sister’s body. Ch. 4: More about the woman in labor from ch. 2, a mention of a lot of blood, a girl bites someone. Ch. 6: Mention of babies who died. Ch. 10: Mention of people forcing children to take off their clothes to bathe; a man sneaks into the children’s bedroom, but doesn’t do anything. Ch. 12: A fight, a mention of a man who did things to children, a boy and girl holding hands. Ch. 13: A woman goes to a man’s house at night (nothing happens; they’re working on a project). Ch. 14: Stealing, woman hurting children, occasional mentions of whiskey, a girl is found who has been raped. Ch. 16: “Why in the name of St. Francis not?”, “there’ll be the devil to pay”, a girl put in solitary confinement and mistreated, someone thinks of jumping from a window and wishes they could die. Ch. 17: Mention of “crossing some lines we shouldn’t have” and a baby born out of wedlock, mention of children being taken advantage of and abused. Ch. 18: Mention of a man who “gets whichever kids he wants” at night; a man roughly handles a girl, touches her inappropriately, and almost abuses her; someone thinks about jumping out of a window to kill themselves again. Ch. 19: Unmarried people touch. Ch. 20: A mention of a woman who had miscarriages and has scars on her wrists, a flashback to a man touching someone inappropriately. Ch. 21: Some kisses, an unmarried couple touches. Ch. 22: Mention of a man who got drunk and beat his boys, mention of a girl opening her shirt to prove she’s a girl, mention of a woman who died. Ch. 24: Mention of a man who gets drunk frequently, and a boat catches fire and sinks. Ch. 25: Remembering a kiss (unmarried couple).

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